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we just go back from the MSPCA in methuan. we just put to rest the best friend i have ever had. today, we put my dog, Belle, to sleep. we were with her when she went. she was 14 1/2 years old. we got her the summer after i turned 10. she had been with me through a ton of really rough times, and had always loved me no matter what. i will miss her so much. i have her collar and leash with me. they are the last physical remains of a wonderful life. she was the best dog a girl could ever ask for.

i love you Boo. you were the best dog ever! i love you and will see you again when i reach the summerland!
it has been a month since this world lost one of the greatest kids. she was brave and a fighter till the very end. i truly believe that she has now found her voice. but that doesn't make it hurt any less. she was my little boo and my heart breaks every day because i miss her so much. she was a shining star in the world. no matter how bad a day she was having she would always laugh. that laugh stays in my mind. it will be there forever. i sit here missing her and wishing i could have had one more day with her, a day where she was pain-free and able to run around and be silly as she used to be. seeing her in her casket was heart breaking. she didn't look like the little girl i knew. there is the program from her funeral sitting on my fridge. every time i pass it i kiss my hand and then place it on her. she was such a good kid. i know teachers aren't supposed to get so attached to their kids, but she was a special kid. i will love that kid till the end of time. she was like my own. and i treated her as such.

Bryn, you are forever in my heart and my mind, i love you boo, fly and sing like you could never do here!
to my dear little friend,
i will miss you darling. you were always a sunny face when the day was rainy. there was so much life inside of you, and now that little life is gone. but it will live on in my heart, and the hearts of all you have touched. you were one of the good ones. i would have done anything to make you smile. even let you slide a little on the work you had to get done. cooking with you was always the best. you were always so excited to break the eggs, or stir the pasta. anything at all. these last few years, while you were sick, i thought of you everyday. i will never stop thinking of you my boo. may your smile and laughter live on forever!

your Miss Becky

R.I.P. Bryn. i will miss you daily!
ever since thursday i have been really down and out. it really sucks.! i feel so alone with this sometimes. i mean it's such a rare allergy that people tend to ignore it and think, "maybe she just doesn't like tomatoes". it sucks. and i want to cry. i'm trying to look for support groups, but the only ones out there are for wheat, dairy and nuts. nothing for the more rare allergies, or allergies in general. if it was a general one, that would be fine, but they are all specific. i have ordered a new med bracelet, because the one i have sucks and is kinda a little broken (it won't open so you can read the insert). and i want revenge. i want to get back at them for doing this to me. they have made me SO MAD! but i also don't want to get myself or anyone else i know in trouble by doing something we shouldn't. i want to be happy again.....but i'm not sure how. i had been doing SO GOOD. i was happy, and not panicing any more. i was finally doing something good for myself. and thursday just blew everything to shit in my mind.

for those of you who don't know, i have a life-threating allergy to tomatoes in any form. thursday night i went to a new place and ordered food, giving my normal disclaimer of the food allergy, and they ignored it, and i won myself a trip to the ER for approximatly 4 hours thursday night (and four spots on my body that have been pricked with some type of needle, including an IV). since then myself and a few of my friends have called the establihment to try and get some sort of acknowledgement about the incident, and so far none has been recieved.

It just isn't fair. there should be some sort of law stating the rights i have, and there should be mandatory training in ALL facilities where foods are served so that someone like me doesnt end up eating the wrong thing and dying. i was lucky this time. but what about next time? or even the next person to step in that place. how would they feel had they actually killed someone? GRRRRRRRRRR!

it just sucks people. and it's bringing me down hardcore!
I LOVE TWILIGHT PRINCESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
to all my dear friends and family,

last night, the world lost a shining star. his name was Jonathan Wolf.

as some of you know he has been sick for about 8 weeks, and i have told you as much as i know as we have gone along. i read it this morning while getting dressed, and i know today will not be an easy one to go through. i intend to tell those at my work who knew him of his passing, but i'm not sure how many times i can say it. please keep jon in your thoughts today for his family really needs all the love that they can get.

i love you all,

ok, i was thinking today about something....

here's the situation....

Julie and i have been living in this house for almost two years now (as of october it will be two). we rent from my aunt (dad's sister, just for reference sake). when my aunt moved out and we moved in, she left a TON of stuff in various places. like a couch, a ton of pictures, clothing, and other randomn junk. she has made no effort to remove these belongings from my home.

so i fiqure, if she isn't going to take them, after a period of two year don't then then become my property and i can do with them what i will? she knows the items exist, but again i say has made no effort to retrieve them. some of them i don't mind having around, because they remind me of my uncle john (who passed away june 2002), like his cowboy hats and some pictures, and there are some pictures of me and my cousins and sisters from when we were younger that are fun to look at, but the clothing i want to get rid of, and the couch has been torn to shreds by the cats (specifically Sarah), and alot of her stuff is just taking up space we could be using. i think i will look up property laws and stuff, but let me know what people think?
i quit

The Multidimensional Scale of Sexuality

According to my answers, it is likely that I identify as
Homosexual with some heterosexuality
or equally,
Past heterosexual, currently homosexual.

Complete set of results

Homosexual with some heterosexuality: 3
Past heterosexual, currently homosexual: 3
Sequential bisexual: 2
Concurrent bisexual: 1
Asexual: 0
Heterosexual: 0
Heterosexual with some homosexuality: 0
Homosexual: 0
Past homosexual, currently heterosexual: 0


The Multidimensional Scale of Sexuality was devised by Larry Kurdek, B. Berkey and T. Perelman-Hall. It is an extension of the Klein Sexual Orientation Grid, recognising that sexual identities can change over time, people can identify with more than one sexual identity, and that asexuality is a valid sexual identity. The Multidimensional Scale of Sexuality was published in the "Journal of Homosexuality" in 1990.

Take the quiz
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sorry for the long rant people, just on my mind